Happy as a pig in mud

Mum and dad took me to Koroko dam for a walk on Sunday, I played in the water and then found it was a great place for mud.  I just dug and dug, it was great.  Trouble is mum then put me in the river to wash me off, I liked the mud, smells better than shampoo.  Isn't mud good for your face?

Woof ruuuuuffff fff wooof

I have been busy, here there and everywhere, mum and dad took me on holiday to Levin.  Grandad has not been well.  They have a cool garden, holidays are great.
Mum thinks I could enter the agility section of a dog show.   I am really good at weaving in and out of the little posts around the park -mum does not think it is fun though, cos I only do it when I am on a long lead.  Mum is quite good at weaving around the posts, but I have to show her how to do it. she grumbles alot.
Wow it was cold on the feet this morning.    I swim everymorning, mum never seems over impressed.
The other afternoon it was a cold southerly wind and lots of waves, mum panicked a bit when she kept seeing waves wash over me  - coooool (in more ways than one).   Mum cant understand why I can swim every morning and night and balk at going out in the rain to pee.   I mean would she like to pee in the rain.   I hate that swiss ball mum found at the beach, at night it moves around just to annoy me so I bark at it (alot).  The other night it was right where I like to pee, so I barked and barked and mum had to go out in the rain and move it, then I went for my pee. More grumbling!!!   Still I love my mum.
Rufffy

Toilet Paper

Ruffy ruf

Apparently my bro Scott  used to get the end of the toilet paper and put in the loo, then flush it and the toilet paper would all unravel into the bowl.  Mum could not work out where the paper was going!

I can get the end of the roll and pulll it, but I cant get the endit  in the bowl and dont know who to flush it, so I just have to rip into shreds over the hallway, trouble is mum knows its me and where the toilet paper is going - just you wait until I am bigger!!!

Why don't human just do the michael jackson bum walk like us dudes???

Woooof
Charley

Velcroe

Everyone knows velcroe is a big fashion no no, even in doggy land.   Mum bought some black (on sale at Warehouse) waterproof velcroe shoes as she reckons they are easier to put on and off in the morning for our walks.
She forgets I am at foot level, soooooooooo embarrassing.   Well thank god I am a dedicated follower of fashion and can redesignn anything.   The shoes no longer have velcroe, now just slip ons.  Her slippers look better now with the piece missing out the front on one - so up there now.
Hey Tula - can I come to your place, I hear you have a doggy shoe paradise and some shoes may need a bit of a fashion update???

Ruff
Gucchi Poochie
Charley

Buuuruffff
Man that petone beach can be cold, I have been for a few swims lately and bit chilly in there.  Pity the olds dont come in for a swim with me, would be such fun.
Bob came to visit me yesterday, we chased around and around and had fun fights for about an hour and then went for a walk on the beach, I was a wee bit knackered after that, slept well, but had dreams, mums said I was talking in my sleep, I cant remember, must have been dreams about Bob.  He is a bit bigger than me.
I HATE bumble bees, I am scared to go outside on the hot days now, so mum thinks I am turning into a vampire, as I go out on the deck and garden a lot at night.    Dont tell her it is just those damn bees.
I think it would be cool to be a vampire dog - wonder if I could fly like a bat if I flap my ears enough, they are sooooo long now.
Ruff
Charley

ruuff
Today we went for our walk on the beach, what a beautiful morning.  Though mum was not too impressed with me crossing in peak hour traffic on pedestrian crossing and trying to have a poop.
She started dragging me across while I carried on.  She was sooooo embarrassed - and - she did not stop to pick it up, probably in someones garage floor by now or splatted on the rims.
Mum found a swiss ball on the beach, yes a blown up swiss ball, so she thought she would take it home as a joke and say to dad "Charley found a ball at the beach" and then he would see the size of it.
She did not anticipate crossing (yes the same crossing) with small dog on lead and huge swiss ball in the other.   People must have thought :
a) wow that dog is fantastic can chase that size ball
b) what lunatic carries that size ball to the beach for the dog!
c) So she does her swiss ball exercises on the beach in the dark at 6.45am
d) How does the dog return the ball after fetching.
e) Crazy person - now I've seen it all

rufff rufff rufff woof

Bumble Bees (in Polish - Bonk)

Mum cant believe I have been stung by another bee.  I went onto bean bag on deck when Dad got home and ran screaming under their bed.  The bee was still on me, it stung my leg.   Mum says how come I have had two bee stings in my 6 months life and she has never had one in her 21 years of life??

Mum found the bee when she went to bed it was still buzzing around under the bed, she thought they died have they had stung, she put a tissue over it and told Dad to deal with it!

I was a bit scared to sleep on the floor of the bedroom,I was in the lounge - mum took me to my bed and I begged to get on theirs.

Woooooooof

ruffy de ruuf ruffy de ruff woof ruf woof

Round and round the mulberry bush, tail was wagging so fast. Mum had me on a long lead and I shot off and ran around a big pohutukawa tree, so she had to run round to catch up to pull in the lead, so I kept running, she kept running -  so round and round and round we went until she finally got close enough to pull in the lead.

Dad snook into the room with a scary mask on, I barked and barked and growled and barked and then hid behind mums legs.
Mum then came back in with a blonde curly thing on her head, I jumped on her when she sat down and pulled it off, she put it back, so I pulled if off.  She put it on Dad - I just left it, think it suited him.   Mum is too old to look like Marilyn Munro!!!

The weather is cold enough at the beach  to freeze the ............ oh that's right I dont have any anymore!!!!!!!!

Ruff Ruff
Charley (good job my name is spelt this way, could be a boy or girls  name!!!)

Ruff Woof Ruff
I am going to enter NZ's got talent.  I can make a round ball into a cube (with one side missing).  Mum thinks I am amazing - a perfect cube - she cant understand how I get the corners, and I am not telling my secrets otherwise she might try and do it!
I played with a dog called Pepe on the beach last night - who calls a boy pepe, poor thing, did think it was a girl when I first saw him, but what would I know, mum chopped off my testerone supply.
I am behaving pretty well now apparently, though mum was none to pleased when I got wet  playing in dirty puddles, made me laugh so I kept finding puddles down by the river, got myself all wet and dirty, trouble is mum took me home and "gave me another bath!"
woofy ruf

Woofy
I love mum again now, she has taken the collar off and warned me not to pull out the stitches and I am being good.   I feel so much more happier now, Dad thinks I am going to be a good guard dog, I have a deep growl and bark and sit by the door alot now.   Really I am just looking for cats, in particular the one that dares to sleep on the deck at night.   Don't tell Dad!   I love chicken, I love chicken more than anything else, even steak!.

Ruff

Charley

rooooooooof
What the !!!!  I feel like something is missing - this is not good.   I am sore,itchy and have an elizabethan collar - I cant lick or scratch myself -why have the done this to me.   I thought mum was taking my collar off - got all excited, no she put drops in my ears which I hate and put collar back.   Next time she tried, I took off at speed, stitches and all - mum and dad cornered me in the garden, why are they doing this to me, well I think it is mum - she is mean, I am not going to be friendly with her - I am going to love Dad more.   I did get yummy chicken for dinner, so not will not eat biscuits, I did not eat yesterday until the evening, I think she put the biscuits in my other food, she is one tricky person!!!
Bloody collar, cant get into spaces, eating my food is like being a vacuum cleaner, collar fits exactly over the bowl - this is just cruel.
I may forgive, but I will not forget!!!!!!!!!

Last night I barked  growledand barked and barked outside, mum and dad do not know what I was barking at, and I am not telling.   I never bark  - but when I do it is a big bark, I think I could be quite scary guard dog - ooops gotta go someone at the door and I need to lick them to death.
Ruff
Charley

Woof
I though I was being so smart when I took off at speed along the beach this morning and ran home - mum was not impressed at all, she stayed at the beach looking for me, had to ring Dad who found me at the gate, I think I am pretty clever, crossed the main road in peak hour traffic - what is their problem.
Mum look me in the eye and told me I was naughty!   I gave her my "what have I done I am cute look"
but it did not work, so I snook off and curled and and pretended to be asleep.
  Wow talk about punishment, no breakfast, and then they left me at a strange place - what is happening, please come and get me - I will be good????   Mum said to dad, just you remember if you wander the same thing will happen to you, no food, nuts cut off and no walks on the beach for 10 days, and no licking your bits and pieces, will put a bucket on you head as well, WHAT DOES THIS ALL MEAN?

this is ruff, ruff ruff

Charley

I used to be able to run and hide on the dark mornings at the beach -
Not anymore, I can run but cannot hide - as if the coat was not bad enough, I now have a light- now Mum can see me amongst the driftwood, wondering if I swim along the beach I would not be seen.
If I turn my  back and sit down she cant see me until I turn around.   -Where will it end.
Not like this I hope   - please dear god, dont let mum buy one of these!!!!!

mum took these photos this morning,  she reckons she cant see me without the light!!!!

Ruff alright

Sigh!
Was not in good books yesterday, was naughty at the beach - would not stop chasing the other dogs, just trying to be friendly, mum and dad got grumpy because I would not come when they called me, everyone has an off day!   Dad growled at me, mum look angry and dad smacked my bum (anyone called CIFS)
So I was sulky all night and then I would not go to bed, I scrummaged under the bed, picked up and dropped noisey toys, they just ignored me!!!!
Went for a walk this morning, thought I had better behave, mum was really impressed, sat on first command, walked without pulling and came when she called me and I sat at her feet and looked real cute.    Don't think I have really learned my lessons, just giving them a false sense of security (dont tell them).
Had to wear jacket this morning, dear god why????  So I rolled over and over in it in the dirt, so now mum has to wash it - could throw it away.   I don't care about cold southerlies at the beach at 7am.
I am the man!
ps mum put some food outside to see if I go out in the day, hahahahahha, mum caught a cat eating it last night!

Ruffffy ruff ruff
Charley

wooofy woofy ruf
What is it with mum and poop!  Yesterday went home after morning walk to tell dad I did two huge poops, must have weight half a kilo and this morning to tell Dad I did a man size poop, why so surprised - to quote uncle Graham "I am the man"!

Getting worried about talk of getting me fixed, how do I communicate to them I AM NOT BROKEN!

ruf

Woof
I went for two swims on Sunday, was burrrrrr cold, but fun.  Trouble was mum and dad took me home, filled up the flexi washing basket and washed me on the deck, sooooo embarrassing.
I really like sleeping on the bed at night, so I get up, find a toy to give them and stand up by the bed - if they ignore me I go to each side and then start the crying, they usually give in after about 5 minutes - suckers!!!!
Why are they getting me fixed,  I am not broken ??????

Ruuffff

rufff

We went to our last good behaviour class, and wooooof, I set out to impress.

I sat, I stayed, I lay down, I came when called and as there was an audience I decided I would shake hands as well.  Mum and Dad were so impressed, I knew how to shake hands, just waited for the right moment.   One lady there wants me to go on play dates with Pablo and also wants to look after me when mum and dad go away, but mum and dad would never go away without me!!!   Would they??????

I am also learning how to crawl commando –could be a good way of getting treats

 . 

It was cold at the beach this morning 6.45 – but it was fun and I found a dead seagull.  Mum is happyI am learning “leave it” – but only in my own time.

Woofy ruffy

Wooooofy

I stayed home by myself all day the other week, I was good, there were only toys on the floor, mum was sooooo happy.

She has bought me a nice new oilskin coat, look like a Southern man now, thank god! I have not made a mess in the house now for 2 weeks, so I deserved a new coat.   Still prefer not to have one at all, but if I must – oh well.

I met a black lab called Mac and he went into the sea water, so I followed him, well mum and his mum were talking for about 30 minutes!   Now I love the sea water and mum tries to stop me sometimes, something about being sub zero whatever that means.   She is really just embarrassed because my legs look like a rat apparently when I am wet – I am just trim.   So how come I can swim in the sea but not get wet from the rain and have to wear a coat???

Someone needs to tell mum that this is what I would like to do.

- Dog food! My favourite thing!
- A car ride! Just ok, depends where we are going!- A walk in the park and beach! My favourite thing!
- Getting rubbed and petted! My favourite thing!
- Lunch! My favourite thing!
- Played in the garden! My favourite thing!
- Wagged my tail! My favourite thing!
- Milk Bones! My favourite thing!
 - Go to play ball! My favourite thing!
Sleeping on the bed! My favourite thing!

We went to the vegetable market and I was so well behaved when other dogs were being naughty that people stopped to talk to dad about me.

Mum went out for a day and when he came home she had a bandage on her wrist, she had to change it cos everytime I saw it I chewed it (that was fun) – she was not impressed though – no fun sometimes.

Mum takes me to the beach before 7am if it is fine – its fun  - just us two humans there – Oh and lots of seagulls.   I sit and look at them, then I lay real low cos they cant see me when I do that and then I take of real fast and chase them, can never catch them, wonder if I could learn to fly.

 Mum thinks I look cute, tongue out, ears flying – oh dear!

Dad left me at home for 4 hours yesterday, so I did not use dog door – he had to clean up. He was a bit grumpy.

Woof, TGIF

Bob is no longer coming to fight play with me. Never mind I found something else to fight  play with – see photo.  Dad has put in a dog door, soooo funny, mum and dad standing outside the door on a cold morning when they first got up and me laying on my back inside the door – boy was my tail wagging.   I am being quite good though, went out by myself for a pee the other night.  They were so proud of me, so I decided to be even more good and got in and out of the car by myself.

But, mum got me back she did not buy me a Christian Diog raincoat, she was serious I got a $3 Uncle bills one.  Huh.  Ruuuuuufffff

I was on mum and dads bed last night, so mum started the psychological warfare, silly her, she lay on my bed I just looked the other way, she made dad lay there as well, closed my eyes and ignored them – they turfed me off though, back to the floor! 

Woooof
I went for a swin yesterday, I can swim and bring back the stick they keep throwing in, not sure what it is all about, I bring it back and they throw it in again.  Bob and his mum and dad came around and we when the stream.  Bob does not really like the water as much.  We saw a big aerdale dog and I heard my mum saying that would be her next dog, traitor!  And we do not look like rats when wet, how mean, I peed on the floor when we got home, huh!

Bob and Charlie (soggy doggies)

Ruffffff woof ruff
I went for lots of walks on the beach in the weekend and played with the big boys and girls.
Stevies (cavoodle) mum had us for a bbq and she gave me Steves big long stuffed snake that he does not like.   I took it home, attacked it until it was submisive and hid it under the bed.  Mum and dad went out for 5 minutes last night, I was not happy so I peed on the floor- ooops!  I like cat toys, I have a little ball with a bell and it I take into the kitchen I can pat it against the walls, it is soooo much fun to chase.  Stevie does poos that are like little statues or kind of like a Mr Whippy icecream, they are quite cool!

Wooooooof

Woooooooooooooooooooooooof
Mum and Dad took me to good behaviour classes,  - well I showed them. I was laid back and pretty much uninterested in the other dogs jumping and barking.   I did most things and everyone loved me - I lay on my back and looked cute while the teacher was talking. At the end she said to teach us some tricks as well and talked about shaking hands (paws) and a lady in the class said "Charley is so laid back he should be taught the peace sign instead of a shake" Whatever!!!!  I slept on a pillow on the floor beside Dad last night, I was a good boy - maybe they will take away the crate.It was mum and dads wedding anniversay last night - I like pizza!
Tula sent mum a message - good job someone cares about me being left in car at the pub.

You are number 1 on SYFS and SPCA list for being such wayward parents………………………

Leon and I might need to do an intervention and become Charleys foster parents until you two sort yourself out.   Tula is my bestie!.

Wooof
Charley

Woof ruff
I love chasing ducks, I chased some and ended up in the river, mum took me home and washed me, the river was not very clean.  
Mum and Dad went out last night and left me in the car, are they allowed to do that, at the pub in Khandallah drinking and probably gambling!  I think CYFS should be informed, next they will leave me in the carpark at the Casinos.  They did leave me on a nice blankie and some nice chewies though. but still ........
So I whimpered on the way home, until Dad gave in and put me in the front seat with me and when we got home mum gave me some chicken - tooooooo easy!

We are going to good behaviour classes tonight, whatever ! as if I need them.  They may live to regret it.
Rufffffff
Charley

My crate in now in mum and dads room, I was so excited I would not get out of the crate in case they moved it, trouble is mum is coughing at night, soooo annoying. Mum bought home a yellow monkey from work and Bob and I had a big fight over it, once Bob was gone I was not interested in it, I just wanted to growl and fight.   I am starting good behaviour classes tomorrow, hope mum and dad are not wasting their money!  I dont know why they are taking me, I am a good boy.

Charley your uncle Graham says have you tried pooh-ing on the BBQ yet. Make them look like sausages or meat balls!

Ask Dad when you are going out fishing!

rufffff!

Uncle GrahamReplyDelete

Replies

Charley's BlogApr 15, 2012 01:27 PM
Hi Uncle Graham
Let mum know when you are coming for BBQ and I will prepare both sausages and meat balls! I heard Dad talking about fishing, it sounds scary, I saw the lotto dog and it did not look like fun. Mum does not think it is real, cos how come they had a lotto ticket but the ticket went overboard on the otherside of the world!

Wooooof

I now have a blog site – still needs some work to make it dodgy doggy though.

http://charleyinpetone.blogspot.com/2012/04/charley.html

Not too sure about these cool mornings and having to pee outside, a bit icy around the nether regions.  Mum gave me some cooked mince last night – was yum, so I decided not to eat my dried food, thought she would give in and give me some more nice stuff, she didn’t – I am going to work on my sad look more, tried sulking for a while, that did not work either. 

Ruffffffffff

Charley

Wooooof

I don’t like this wet weather, mum is muttering again, something about going to be a long winter and why is a wet dog the most affectionate creature in the world.  It was my turn to laugh (we dogs laugh with our tails you know).

When properly trained,  mum  can be my best friend I think.  I think mum is just an elongated and cunning dog.

Bob and I chewed a big hole in the blue tarp she put on the deck which we pee on!  Mum called to Dad, ‘do you know what they have done now” and dad said “I don’t want to know’ – huh

Ruff ruff

Charley

Roooooof

I got stung by a bee yesterday, it attached to  my chest and would not get off, I starting yelping and running and Dad had to come out and save me.   Bob trod on a bee the day before.  I don’t like bees.

I love scraping my teeth on paua shells, mum told dad that maybe I could become a paua polisher and he could make some jewellery.

I rolled over and fell off the couch last night and mum just laughed – no sympathy – I think she has a mean streak.

I am peeing straight away when taken outside, eating my breakfast without mucking around – mum thinks I am being good and getting better – little does she know – I am giving her a false sense of security – well she shouldn’t laugh at me!.

Woof

Charley

Charley's blog at Easter: Charley says (02/04) (thanking friend for pers...

Charley's blog at Easter:
Charley says  (02/04)   (thanking friend for pers...: Charley says   (02/04)   (thanking friend for personalized jars full of treats. Thank you very much for my treats, I love them and I ...

CHARLEY

Woof, I think I have a blog site.   Not sure about how it works

Charley says  (02/04)   (thanking friend for personalized jars full of treats.

Thank you very much for my treats, I love them and I got  home I chewed through half of my one I started and then I buried it under the pillow on my bed, I dug up the pillow like crazy and now it is hidden from my parents.   I don’t think they know what I have done  ruff rufff

(03/04)

Mum said I had to share a bone treat with Bob, I am not happy, I will get it off him.   Mum was quite excited this morning because I barked a couple of times (the things that amuse some people aye?).  Bob and I have dug a big hole in the corner where Dad put the soil for grass.   I am starting to like my own space and mum is a bit peeved that I won’t sit on her knee all night.  I like to be in range but – I am a boy – I need some space man.  Bob is the same, well that is what I heard Bobs dad telling mum.

Ruff Ruff

Charley

04/04

Mum got her new camera, driving me crazy taking photos.   Mum found my chewy bone so I ran off with it, she knows its in the bedroom somewhere, just can find it.   Dad put some wood in front of where Bob and I dig – I think he thinks we are tunneling out, so we just started another big hole.

Bobs parents give him corn to eat, now mum can identify our poos.   We can also get washing off the line.  Mum found out this morning I had chewed the top of the watering system, I tried to do it the other day, and Dad turned the water on.   I just waited till they were out – he doesn’t know yet!

Might lay low for a while.

Ruff

Charley

Mums friend Jeanette has suggested she start Sherlock Hounds Inc. springs forth to identify corn smelling poops.

Bob and I had fun yesterday, we ripped papers to shreds, got the AA magazine still in plastic and ripped it apart,pooped and weed everywhere, mum was muttering – who is God – hear that name alot?

We went for a walk last night to the beach at 9.30pm – I mean who walks at that time, so I did not poo or wee and waited till we got back and peed on the deck, wonder if they get the message.

Mum went to take me out this morning and I broke loose and ran to bedroom, she was muttering something about being faster than John Walker and the 3 minute mile.   Mum does a lot of muttering.

Woof

Charley

Ps Bob had corn yesterday.

I had a word to Jeanette I  want to know “as winter approaches will my wardrobe be increasing. I would like Mum to go to Kirks to the 'Haute Canine Couture' section and look for either a Pierre Cardog coat or a Christian Diog. Please 'None of those homemade jumpers down to the ground that inhibits taking off when the spirit gets that let's rip feeling'…….

Mum is certainly going to have her hands full…but I think this is Bob's influence, he's a naughty bugger leading me on.”  (thanks J for translating)

Mum said, “you’ll be lucky – you might get a plastic rain coat from Uncle Bills ($3)” – she can be quite mean.

I have dug a long hold beside the shed, I can now lay in it, I don’t think they can see me when I lay in it.

Met Grandma and Grandad , uncle  Graham and auntie Bernie in the weekend, I did my cute butter would not melt in my mouth act.   Toooooo easy!

Ps I am working on getting  my own blog site.